Happy 1st Birthday Kaylee!

Today Kaylee turned 1 - see her in her cute birthday hat at daycare? Really sweet.

Today is a day with mixed emotions as I had to have a pregnancy ended because of complications (cervical ectopic). I had an injection that will affect my breastmilk making it impossible to nurse for 7-10 days, some doctors say 3 months. We are going to use this as an opportunity to move Kaylee to soy milk. A friend with a stockpile of breastmilk has volunteered to donate to us so that we can cut it with soy milk to make it less sudden on her little baby stomach.  I am not looking forward to tonight's heartbreaking cries for nursing...we will make it through and thankfully she loves to sleep in her carseat so we are anticipating taking her for long drives. I called her pediatrician today and she was a lot more concerned with me than with Kaylee. She said Kaylee can do fine with this although the transition will be hard.

I didn't plan on sharing this with everyone but everyone is beginning to find out anyways and it may as well be from me, straight from the source. I will post on how I feel tomorrow - so far I don't feel any different - it was just a shot to the butt.  

We were told the pregnancy had no viability to continue and that it would be very dangerous for me to wait for it to end itself - possible hemorrhaging and hysterectomy would've been on the table. So I got three doctors opinions in the process, and all recommended this route so we are comfortable with our decision. The baby had no heartbeat at all yet - if it was a baby at all we weren't sure of that either from the ultrasound images. 

Today Kaylee moved up to the transition room. Dropping her off was hard because William was crying his head off and that of course made Kaylee cry too. But we snuck in to pay our bill about 2 hours later, and she was sitting at the table eating her lunch and she looked happy. And you can see from the birthday hat photo that she looks very content. My little sweet giggling beautiful ray of sunshine is making dealing with this loss a lot lot easier.  I will be able to get pregnant again someday (but must not for 3 months at least)...

We are very happy to have had the chance to celebrate her birthday at the parties we had this past weekend. It would've been harder to celebrate at this upcoming weekend with all that is happening. We have those happy memories - thanks to everyone for making it so special!